Dear Taffy:

I had a really bad week-end. I got in big trouble and am still in time out. It really wasn’t my fault. The steaks were just sitting there, ready to be eaten. How was I supposed to know they weren’t for me? It was dinnertime after all, and I hadn’t been fed yet. So I thought I would be helpful and feed myself…the steaks…WELL, did I make a mistake! I got in SO MUCH trouble! I got yelled at and put in time out. I didn’t get fed dinner, and haven’t had my nightly couch snuggles with Mom and Dad.  How can I get out of trouble?

Signed,

Forked

Dear Forked,

Okay, I’m not sure how things roll in your house, but at my house, generally, the food for me is NOT left on the counter out in the open. Clearly your primal instinct overtook your ability to reason and restrain yourself. So first, make a note-to-self to remember that just because food is on the counter, does not necessarily your buffet. Now, to get back in good graces, you are going to have to lay low for a couple of days. Dramatically pout. Act lethargic. Don’t eat all of your food. They will start to feel bad because either they will (1) worry that you are sick, and take you to the vet, which always means treats and love; or (2) realize you are sad and you are sorry, making them sympathetic and ready for snuggles. Either way, it won’t last long. In my experience, our people get over those things pretty quickly because they miss our kisses as much as we miss theirs.  Good luck!

Signed,

Taffy