I hate balls on my feet!

I hate balls on my feet!


Dear Taffy:

It is now winter here where I leave, and as much as I love playing in the snow (especially when Mom and Dad shovel the driveway snow and throw it at me), I DO NOT like the gushy, mushy stuff Mom puts on my feet before I go outside. Mom says it is because my feet are hairy – OF COURSE THEY ARE – I am a dog after all! She does it because she says I am annoying when we are on the snow trails because, understandably, I stop and try to get the snowballs off my feet. What is the problem with that? According to Mom, the problem is the more I bite the snowballs off, the more that end up on my feet. To combat the snowball problem, Mom puts this NASTY, foul tasting (even for me, who likes to eat trail morsels, if you know what I mean) gunk in between my toes. AND, even more annoying, she makes me wait for what seems like HOURS before I can get out of the car while she puts it on. I really hate the whole process. Do you have any suggestions?

Signed,

Snowballs


 

Dear Snowballs:

I completely understand what you go through in the winter. It is quite the process, but think of the alternative: you could be left at home and not go on the hike or the trail. That would be worse. However, you may have a shot at getting her to change the nasty mess to something tastier, like PAM. You know what that is, right? (Well I know because I am a brilliant Border Collie). It is the stuff your Mom or Dad sprays in the pan before they cook eggs. Here’s what you can do. Next time she puts the nasty gunk on your feet, make yourself gag and almost puke. Hack really hard in the car, multiple hacks per foot as she puts it on. It will make  her stop for a second and wonder what’s up. You may have to do that a couple of times, but she will get the hint. THEN she will try something else, and I’m sure one of her friends will suggest PAM. You will be amazed at the difference! Especially if she gets the butter flavored PAM. The bonus is that in addition to reducing the snowball accumulation, there is a tasty treat right on your feet! Good luck and happy winter!

Signed,

Taffy

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