Me vs. Chipmunks

Me vs. Chipmunks


Dear Taffy:

Every day at my house, whether it is morning, afternoon or night, I am invaded by naughty chipmunks who clearly do not understand the rules around here. They run right by the door – the very door that I go in and out of to patrol. They stop. Right in front of my door and LOOK AT ME. All the while I sound out the alert as loud as I can and FINALLY Mom lets me out. The problem is, by the time Mom lets me out, they had the time to dive into the big rocks by our driveway –their “safe zone”. I stick my nose in the rocks as far as I can, but I can’t quite grab them. I eyeball them – I know they see and feel me. Yet they stay there. Annoyingly squawking and squeaking as loud as they can. I think they mock me. How can I teach them the rules?

Signed,
I AM THE BOSS ‘ROUND HERE!


 

Dear Boss:
Ahhhh yes, the chipmunks – as smart as I am, I’m not even sure what good they are. Your biggest problem is their size. The rock crevices provide the perfect cover for those tiny nuisances. Short of patrolling 24/7, I would suggest you use your time when you are outside wisely. By that I mean to slowly but surely place sticks, rocks, leaves, balls, bones – whatever you have, in between the rocks where they hide. Slowly and stealthily. Then, as you start to block their spaces, pay attention to where they go next, and continue following their pattern, and systematically block all of their access. Fortunately for you, they aren’t that bright, so when you limit where they can hide….they are your prisoners. Done and done.

Signed,
Taffy

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