Dear Taffy:

I have a BFF dilemma. I have a BFF who lives down the street and comes up to play a lot – every day actually. Apparently it is more fun at my house then hers, and we have better treats. Anyway, the problem is that she is super annoying when, after we are done playing and investigating the yard and whatnot, she won’t just chill out! She keeps on being hyper! She won’t take the hint when I lay on our outside couch that I am DONE. She even jumps up on MY couch with me and tugs at my collar. Seriously? I don’t want to hurt her feelings, but I have tried growling (in a nice bff kind of way); ignoring her and standing at the back door praying Mom would let me in. Nothing works. I love her, so I don’t want to end the friendship, but I need the down time!


Trying to Chill


Dear Chill:

That is an annoying problem.  Sounds like you are not clearly communicating your message to your BFF and being a bit passive. Instead of growling in a “nice BFF way”, REALLY GROWL like you mean it. You should practice this in the mirror so you are comfortable and confident with the increase in volume and intensity. As you practice your Meaningful Growl, repeat the following affirmation: “I am strong and clear in what I want”. Repeat that mantra several times, along with your Meaningful Growl in front of the mirror. Then, once you are ready to unleash the “new” you, go for it! Your BFF will be so surprised and very clear about what you want to happen. Then, following the Meaningful Growl, go lay down on your couch and turn your back to her. She will get the message and give you your chill time. Once you are ready to play again, the boundaries will be clear and you two will be back at your game. Growl with confidence!


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